Tuesday, June 14, 2016

Clarity Found

When you are lucky enough to sit in the quiet and listen to the sounds of the world around you, something else happens...  You hear your little inner voice start talking.  For me, most of those moments are reflective moments as well as moments of growth.  I am ok being alone with my thoughts, they are not harmful, but rather a better understanding of me, my life and the people I chose to have in my life.

Life lessons have occurred in these moments.  One of the biggest lessons is learning you cannot force someone to be who they were, you can only accept who they have become and if they don't fit into your life anymore that is ok.  It can be a difficult moment when you realize a person has changed so drastically that they no longer want you in their life.  Some will take the immature and easy way out, others will face it as an adult, but the bravest are those who bide their time and allow the relationship to sever the way a candle slowly burns out.

The loss of a friendship comes in many forms, but mostly from a difference of opinion that somehow becomes a bigger problem than the strength of the friendship.  It isn't like a relationship when it is over.  You can't call this person when your heart is hurting because they are the ones who caused the hurt; you cannot ask if you were the one who changed so drastically, because they have shown you out of their life; and you are left with the crumbling resolve that they are in fact the person who has changed, they are the person who chose not to take responsibility, and eventually you realize they weren't the friend you made in the beginning and those ties have slowly worn out and eventually broken.

It is never easy to lose a friend, especially one that should have been a life long friend... The fact is, people change and make decisions you don't always agree with and sometimes the best resolution for both of you is to allow that break and move down your separate paths and be thankful for time you spent, but more thankful for the clarity you now have.