Saturday, May 21, 2016

Two Date Rule

I'm  pretty sure everyone and their mother can agree that dating pretty much sucks. If you say it is fun I may want to punch you. Sure there are moments of excitement, but for a planner, always looking to the next step type person, like me, it is torture. 

First dates can be super fun, horrible, awkward, or if you're lucky, a combination of all three. 
There are nerves. 
You second guess yourself. 
You spend hours picking out the perfect outfit in your head only to realize it looks like shit on. 
You contemplate postponing... But inevitably you show up for the date. 

The date probably goes ok and here is where my rule comes in.... Yes first impressions are everything, but second impressions are more. I'll get there, just hang tight.  First dates are just a lot of pressure which is why I am a firm believer in the two date rule. 

It's simple, you don't have to commit hours to person, but a a good hour for a second date after the first initial date is pretty paramount. There are less nerves, more communication. You're relaxed because you kinda sorta know this person after the first date.  In my experience, people are more willing to discuss what they're looking for and what they're not looking for. Honesty comes out more in a second date as first date it's all about being impressive. 

The thing is, we now live in a world where "hooking up" is our culture and yes there are those who are looking for more, but they will never find each other if they continue to date as "hook up" artists. Where is the harm in going out a few times and getting to know the person?  It aggravates me when I don't hear back after a first date, because I know the guy has only scratched the surface to who I am. In doing so, he has cheated me as well as himself.