Tuesday, August 15, 2017

Beer Spiller Dude

Lately I have been toying with the idea of online dating again.  Previously I have done it and I met some cool pen pals, but nothing really came to fruition.  I also was very lucky and never had to deal with stereotypical dillweeds of Tinder and Bumble.  Blame my low bullshit tolerance on that one... Bye, Felipe.

The thing is, when you have an amazing tribe of girls who are all single, you all complain and start thinking about all of you dating and doing this whole app dating thing together.  It can be fun, it can fill time while you all sit back and finish bottles of wine...  Your friends help with the superficial swipe and later help with the awkward first messages and in some cases (yes we have all done it), appear on first meetings... Safety in girl friends!

It all sounds like so much fun, right?  It isn't!  Dating is freaking exhausting, even more so when your phone is constantly yelling at you about your matches expiring.  The last thing I really want to add to my work, home, friend, workout schedule is a dating app, but I was at a loss and everyone was doing it, so I again downloaded Bumble and it was exactly what I described above... Torture.  Absolute torture.

I have been sitting in an internal battle over this whole dating app crap and honestly it is quite comical.  I really don't want to meet someone from an app.  Wouldn't it be such a better story to say we met at a bar when my sandal got stuck to his shit?  Or that we bonded over a mutual love of Bob Seger?  Better yet, that he spilled his pitcher of beer down my back?  Of course, there is always the bookstore or grocery aisle to meet as well...  

Recently my disdain of meeting on an app was firmly placed into concrete when a guy walked by me at a bar, my flip flop actually got stuck to his shirt ( I was sitting like a lady on a tall bar stool) and he spilled his pitcher all over my legs.  We ended up talking after quite a bit of shit talking about the spilled beer.  The conversations were laughable and the excitement of meeting someone new was palpable.  At the end of the night, we didn't exchange numbers and went our separate ways, but it made me realize that without a doubt, I DON'T WANT TO MEET ANYONE FROM A DATING APP!

I don't want this picture perfect image and filtered lifestyle.  I want to see the nitty gritty and find out your sense of humor and what you do for a living in our first face to face conversation.  I don't want to text for months on end and have those conversations fizzle and be left wondering why.  

I don't want app perfection, I want messy life experiences.

So thanks Beer Spiller Dude for being the reason I realized what I knew all along!


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